英语幽默句子大全【精彩3篇】
英语幽默句子大全 篇一
Are you free tonight? No, I'm expensive.
I'm not lazy, I'm on energy-saving mode.
I used to play hide and seek when I was younger. It wasn't until they found a new hiding spot that I realized I was terrible at the game.
I'm not clumsy. The floor just hates me, the table and chairs are bullies, and the walls get in my way.
I'm not arguing, I'm just explaining why I'm right.
I'm not short, I'm fun-sized.
I don't need anger management. I need people to stop pissing me off.
I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.
I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure.
I'm not a shopaholic, I'm helping the economy.
I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.
I'm not weird, I'm a limited edition.
I'm not a morning person. I'm a not-a-morning-person person.
I'm not a control freak. But can I show you the right way to do that?
I'm not sarcastic. I'm just intelligent beyond your understanding.
英语幽默句子大全 篇二
I'm not a complete idiot. Some parts are missing.
Always remember that you're unique. Just like everyone else.
I'm not arguing, I'm just explaining why I'm right.
I'm not lazy, I'm on energy-saving mode.
I'm not short, I'm fun-sized.
I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure.
I'm not a morning person. I'm a not-a-morning-person person.
I'm not a control freak. But can I show you the right way to do that?
I'm not a shopaholic, I'm helping the economy.
I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.
I'm not weird, I'm a limited edition.
I'm not sarcastic. I'm just intelligent beyond your understanding.
I don't need anger management. I need people to stop pissing me off.
I'm not clumsy. The floor just hates me, the table and chairs are bullies, and the walls get in my way.
I'm not a morning person. I'm a not-a-morning-person person.
英语幽默句子大全 篇三
1)Moneyisnoteverything.There?sMastercard&Visa.
钞票不是万能的，有时还需要信用卡。
2)Oneshouldloveanimals.Theyaresotasty.
每个人都应该热爱动物，因为它们很好吃。
3)Savewater.Showerwithyourgirlfriend.要节约用水，尽量和女友一起洗澡。
4)Lovetheneighbor.Butdon?tgetcaught.
要用心去爱你的邻居，不过不要让她的老公知道。
5)Behindeverysuccessfulman,thereisawoman.Andbehindeveryunsuccessfulman,therearetwo.每个成功男人的背后，都有一个女人。每个不成功男人的背后，都有两个女人。
6)Everymanshouldmarry.Afterall,happinessisnottheonlythinginlife.
再快乐的单身汉迟早也会结婚，幸福不是永久的嘛。
7)Thewisenevermarry,Andwhentheymarrytheybecomeotherwise.
聪明人都是未婚的，结婚的人很难再聪明起来。
8)Successisarelativeterm.Itbringssomanyrelatives.
成功是一个相关名词，他会给你带来很多不相关的亲戚（联系）。
9)Neverputofftheworktilltomorrowwhatyoucanputofftoday.
不要等明天交不上差再找借口，今天就要找好。
10)Loveisphotogenic.Itneedsdarknesstodevelop.
爱情就象照片，需要大量的暗房时间来培养。（老外也保守，要摸黑办事，哈哈）
11)Childreninbackseatscauseaccidents.Accidentsinbackseatscausechildren.后排座位上的小孩会生出意外，后排座位上的意外会生出小孩。
12)"Yourfuturedependsonyourdreams."Sogotosleep."
现在的梦想决定着你的将来"，所以还是再睡一会吧。
13)Thereshouldbeabetterwaytostartadaythanwakingupeverymorning.
应该有更好的方式开始新一天，而不是千篇一律的在每个上午都醒来。
14)"Hardworkneverkilledanybody."Butwhytaketherisk?"
"努力工作不会导致死亡！"不过我不会用自己去证明。
15)"Workfascinatesme."Icanlookatitforhours!"
"工作好有意思耶！"尤其是看着别人工作。
16)Godmaderelatives;ThankGodwecanchooseourfriends.
神决定了谁是你的亲戚，幸运的是在选择朋友方面他给了你留了余地。
17)Whentwo?scompany,three?stheresult!两个人的状态是不稳定的，三个人才是！
18)Adressislikeabarbedfence.Itprotectsthepremiseswithoutrestrictingtheview.服饰就象铁丝网，它阻止你冒然行动但并不妨碍你尽情的观看。
